Category: Series Six

There are three states that matter.

The first one, it’s like a liquid – you’re always moving, constantly searching. For what? It doesn’t know. I don’t know. Searching for the next thing, I guess. Something.

The second, someone is running. Running from something. Escaping, and hoping to soon be dissipating. But as the gas fades and transparency forms, and there’s no sign of anything having once ever been there, you’re still there. You haven’t escaped. You haven’t escaped yet. And by the time you do, you’ll never be any the wiser.

The third and final – and equally the worst but maybe even the best – is contentment. You’re not moving. You’ve found it. You’re solid.

“So is this you now? You’re just going to be philosophical? I’m trying to have some fun.”

“We’re all trying to have some fun. But the sooner we can face that we’re in one of these three states, the sooner we can try to do something that matters.”

“Yeah, and what’s that? Go to a coffee shop and pretend to be sophisticated? Watch the cool, new movie that has a plotline that’s been repeated and regurgitated since mythology written hundreds upon thousands of years ago? Organize a spice rack? Look around. This is all there is. Either get with the program, enjoy it for a few years, or disappear. That’s all there is.”

“So now when did you get all philosophical? You really don’t think there’s anything more?”

“I know there isn’t anything more.”

“I believe there is. There’s got to be.”

“There’s not. Try to have some fun. Be a solid. Be content. With the fact that this is all there is. So: Have. Some. Fun.”

“You heard yourself, though, right? You’re talking about one the states that matter.”

“Nothing matters. Just disappear here. If you can’t admit it, you should just disappear here.”

“Disappear where?”

“Here.”

“Where is here?”

“I don’t know. It’s fucking right here. What do you mean?”

Voices weave and stream through my head. Be something good for the world. Be someone who makes the world a better place. Leave it better than when you entered it. Leave behind a legacy.

Disappear here.

Or be happy with a family, a good job, and a hobby or two.

Disappear here.

Or just party. Always. Constantly. Consistently. And say fuck it and anything and everything.

Disappear here.

Or go off the grid. For now, and forever. Until this life is over, and until you’ve disappeared here.

Where?

Here. There. Wherever. It doesn’t matter. Nothing does. Keep searching for what you’re supposed to be. Run from who you are. Or achieve enlightenment and be content – and apathetic and easy to forget.

Disappear here.